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Monday, June 26, 2006

Out of it

I've been out of it for some time now. The "it" meaning life in general, I suppose. Feeling a tad rudderless, which is suspiciously like a mid-life crisis. I had a mid-mid-life crisis when I was 20, so I've been there, done that, but somehow this one seems to bring with it more melancholy.

So what to do? Ah, therein lies the crux of the issue. What to do with the rest of my life. Maybe I should go back to school (shudder). Maybe I should buy a house (peels of laughter - I recently calculated that to buy an average-priced home in Calgary - $375,000 - I would have to earn $130,000/year. ) Maybe I should get a dog (oops, not allowed by The Cat or The Landlord.)

Maybe I should just suck it up, Princess. Things could be a lot worse. And I do have fabulous new lino and carpet in my apartment after much upheaval. And no back strain as a result. A Very Good Thing.

I think I should turn my mind back to changing the world. I have recently tried to salvage some of the Sunnyside School trees that are scheduled for death by chainsaw soon. Tried to convince the powers that be that more Urban Bird Condo Timeshares are needed. And you know what? They are considering it. I shall consider it a personal triumph if it happens.

And maybe that's really all that matters after all. Making a difference - any difference.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

The Kindness of (or to) Strangers

I'm back from my vacation with friends and family. In my absence, the showerhead fell off, the kitchen sink plugged up, and while I arrived home at 8:00 pm last night, the new lino for my apartment arrived at 7:30 am this morning. And so it goes. Off to a good start. But the cat is healthy and happy and that is really all that matters.

I was thinking about spending time with family today. I was having a rather good day with strangers - good chats with the plumber and the checkout clerk and all that. And I wondered why I found it easier to be nice to complete strangers than to my family. I can get a bit stroppy with my parents. The almost two weeks I spent with them was lovely, but there were times I craved my own company and felt put upon to do things I'd rather not. But to keep the peace I would go along and then be a bit mopey or sharpish. Not one of my more endearing qualities.

But I'm charming with strangers, or even acquaintances. (I met one in the washroom of a service stop on the 401 in Ontario - go figure!) Which makes me wonder if the more you get to know me, the nastier I will treat you. Familiarity breeds contempt and all that. Or maybe that really is my personality, and I try hard to play a role of a jovial bon vivant to the outside world? Or perhaps there are multiple dimensions and another of my possible existences comes creeping through once in awhile? Who knows. I must resolve to be nicer to people though - all people - even those to whom I am related by blood.

Good resolution. I wonder if I'm adopted in a parallel universe?