On Children and Happiness
I just heard Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness interviewed by Stephen Colbert. The interview itself was highly amusing, as is most anything done by Colbert, but I also learned a fact that reinforced what I had inherently known since my own childhood.
Children do not make you a happier person. In fact, they have a slightly negative effect on your happiness.
This is a huge shot on the arm for someone who has known, well, forever, that they don't want kids. It also provides some factual basis for responses to people who are shocked and appalled by my lack of self-replication. And indeed it does provide some comfort, as many of my friends have been happily procreating for years - but apparently they have actually been unhappily procreating for years. I admit I sometimes wondered. To my friends (and you know who you are) who have joined me on this child-free journey of life, affirmation and glee. To my friends who have gone down the road of procreation and self-denial, told you so.
A bit harsh? Perhaps. But there is nothing so frustrating as a smug parent looking at you and you know they're thinking, "Shame. She would have been so much happier if she'd had kids."
No I wouldn't, and now I have the science to back it up.
Ain't life (without kids) grand.
Children do not make you a happier person. In fact, they have a slightly negative effect on your happiness.
This is a huge shot on the arm for someone who has known, well, forever, that they don't want kids. It also provides some factual basis for responses to people who are shocked and appalled by my lack of self-replication. And indeed it does provide some comfort, as many of my friends have been happily procreating for years - but apparently they have actually been unhappily procreating for years. I admit I sometimes wondered. To my friends (and you know who you are) who have joined me on this child-free journey of life, affirmation and glee. To my friends who have gone down the road of procreation and self-denial, told you so.
A bit harsh? Perhaps. But there is nothing so frustrating as a smug parent looking at you and you know they're thinking, "Shame. She would have been so much happier if she'd had kids."
No I wouldn't, and now I have the science to back it up.
Ain't life (without kids) grand.
Comments
In defence of, well, everyone, having kids is for some people and not for others. I believe there really isn't a 'right or wrong' here. Some people don't 'get' my position either. I'm of the mind that if I eventually settle down with someone and we decide to have kids, great. If not, great. Having a family, for me, isn't a priority and I think you and I both may giggle a little to watch people stumble around frantically looking for someone with whom to have kids. I've seen far too many people settle on the wrong partner, only later to discover (with kids in the mix) that it's simply not right.
Besides, right now I'm enjoying the freedom that comes with being single.
My position differs somewhat on this one, but I've no intention of sharing it. :-) That would just be asking for trouble.
Besides, your vehemence is part of your never-to-be replicated charm.